Dhara is my special Universal Friend ... we're connected in the most fascinating way imaginable - I won't call it 'telepathy', it's more a constant 'consciousness' of each other's presence in time and this space. 

Dhara is a teacher of Ascention at the Society for Ascention in North Carolina, USA. She travels the world to teach people how to use this meditation-like method to improve their lives.  I first met her when she came to South Africa in December 1999 to teach Ascention here and attend the Congress of World Religions, which was held here in Cape Town.  Her friend, Adya, who accompanied Dhara on her travels during that time, was also at the society and had a great influence on me as well.

I see Dhara as a source of great inspiration (like I do Madonna), and I allow myself to follow advice that she may give me from time to time. Dhara is full of wisdom, but, like me, also learning about the universe and about how things work. I thought it wise then too, to add some of her e-mails regarding advice, motivation and wisdom below.

Rest | Evolution of Life | Ascension| True Love

"The Rest" - (30/10/2K): I had this amazing experience with accepting myself, wrote about it, and then made it onto an article. Then I read an e-mail my friend wrote that went out to all our friends, that included, "... Dhara is no longer concerned with body size." It was so scary to read that! You know how things go back and forth. Sometimes I don't feel sad or less than, and sometimes I do. And I feel okay about that, when it's just me noticing the changes in my life. But when I wrote an article about one experience, and then that experience changed (like it always does)... I felt like a liar when I went back and read the article the next day. "What a wonderful thing to share with all the women," my friend told me. "Let's make it into an article." And I totally agreed. Then I thought writing about the other side might even be more wonderful for women! For everybody! Because it happens so much. Just when you think you love yourself, you see a wrinkle! ;) I think it might even hurt more, to go from accepting ourselves, to not feeling that way after we've felt what the other was like! And I want to support people in Knowing that they're all-right. The ups and downs are natural/normal. It's not by living on only the 'up' side of life that I've found peace, and joy. It's been by experiencing the fact of the Changes in Life, without too much resistance. Everyone experiences the 'expand and contract', and we've done nothing wrong when that contraction comes. And we all know this! But that doesn't stop us from feeling a number of ways, when it happens. We've even probably all said, "Oh yeah. That always happens. I should know this by now", in hind sight. AND when we are not expecting ourselves to feel one way permanently, then when the NATURAL IMPERMANENCE OF LIFE happens, we don't feel so devastated. I know how much hell I put myself through, in thinking that other people experienced things (mostly positive changes in their lives) more permanantly than me. Most of that was because when the people experienced thier contraction, I wasn't there to see it! I had this idea in my mind that they always felt 'so expanded'. Because the mind takes one experience, and makes a concept of that experience in the 'perpetual state'. The mind, although living in the changing for so long, continues to try and convince us that there are some unchanging things in the changing!!!!!!!!! So, I guess more than accepting any one part of myself; my body, personality, etc. I'm accepting that everything's going to change. I used to think there would be this "one glorious day", where I loved myself completely, and that meant that I would be happy about everything from then on. 'Perfect' to me meant; experiencing only the positive side of duality, all the time. Now, I do experiencing One thing that is Unchanging. And That is completely accepting of everything, It is complete acceptance. Absolute Bliss, total unflawed perfection, "all the time", perpetually. But It did not 'get this way', work toward this goal, in fact It has never changed in any way. It is the Unchanging, and this is It's Natural state. There couldn't be anything wrong with it, even if It wanted there to be. :) And when I'm experiencing This .... well, then there is no "I" to worry about loving or not loving, accepting or not accepting anyway. Top

Evolution of Life (12/10/2K): Life is naturally evolving all the time. (just look at history) we are constantly evolving, naturally. The speed depends on if we are consciously choosing for it, and even more important BEING WILLING TO LET EVOLUTION HAPPEN!!!!!!!!!!!! BE OKAY WITH CHANGE. FLOW WITH CHANGE, EVOLVE WITH CHANGE, INSTEAD OF FIGHTING AGAINST THE CHANGE AND CONSTANTLY WISHING SOME THINGS WOULD CHANGE, WHILE TRYING TO MAKE OTHER THINGS STAY THE SAME.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So intead of thinking all the things we need to change to make ourselves better, we can accept that we are in a constant state of evolution. and by accepting ourselves for how we are currently, that makes the 'growth process' (aka natural evolution) happen more quickly and easily. ALSO KNOW THIS: EVENTUALLY YOU WILL HAVE TO ACCEPT EVERY PART OF YOU. EVEN THE 'UGLY PARTS' THAT WE ARE WORKING SO HARD TO CHANGE (because we dont like to experience those much). But accepting doesn't mean that we have to act those ways, it just means we stop trying to hide those parts, and then we are no longer controlled by them. Top

Ascension (12/10/2K): Something I just thought of, it may or may not help, but there's this thought, that is very subtle, and when we believe it ... watch out! Its many different forms of, "If only this or that, then I would be happy." "If only she was this way, then that wouldn't happen", "if he would just this or that, than I would be fine, happy, not feeling this way....... etc". You know the one I am talking about? Well, this thought basically starts us on a never ending loop, because usually the "thing that needs to change" in order to solve the problem, is not something we have control over to change! So instead of facing up to what we are feeling or whatever, we are left feeling helpless to some situation. And the thing that is the 'cause', gets resented to the max! When our problems are based on an outside thing that is wrong, our minds (because its their job to solve problems) continually work on, and come up with all sorts of solutions to "fix the person or object" that is ruining our life! :) With ascension, we are actively doing the one thing we have control over. Choosing Praise instead of Criticism. By simply thinking the technique, even if we don't feel Praise at the time. Sometimes you will feel more calm and relaxed, and see the sitution in a totally different way instantly. Sometimes you will feel even more sad or angry. Sometimes it may feel like nothing is happening, but that's fine. the techniques are mechanical. So, one of the biggest things you can do, is be willing to be to let what ever happens, happen. this is huge. To let go. Rather than learning more things to "do", finding new ways to fix things. Just do your best to let things happen. it might sound weIrd, but doing less, and relaxing more. This is the most powerful thing you can do for spiritual growth. And probably the hardest thing to do, as well. (Because of the "must do, must work hard" that has been pounded into us all our lives). It's so easy to feel like we can "do something about it", we feel in control. I dont know exactly what meditaion does in every life, but I know that it always works out for the Extreme better when practiced regularly. Top

True Love (12/10/2K): Here I am. Again. Always seem to begin this way, 'here I am'. Guess it's been a clue I have been dropping to myself, my whole life long. I'm listening to this lovely music that was given to me for my b-day. This whole thing (life) is so amazing, isn't it? All that stuff that I read in books. All those things I heard about 'unlimited experiences', well, it's real, it seems. Fulfillment on the inside. Wow. Not just a concept. I and my father are one. Yup, that too. Wow. So simple, so beautiful. I woke up this morning, wrapped up in my own love. Like an invisible lover, that was so natural, so real, that I didn't even think a thing about it until later. It's not even that I didn't question any perfect moment of it, but that the thought of doubting it didn't even occur to me. And now, as I sit here writing this, my lover is here. Hugging me from the inside. And the outside as well. it's like being in love with someone, but there never being a longing to see them. Never missing them. Never feeling suffocated by their love. Never having to ask for a hug, or ask for them to give me some space. there is only this clean, wrapped up in warm, simple, love, feeling. it's the 'never going away' part that is the 'best'. The unchanging part. There's no grasping on to anything , there's just this complete allowing, because of this experience of not being able to lose the unchanging ... I guess. There's no thinking about the experience, like wondering if it's real, or how to describe it. I can enjoy it, and that's it. No need to really wonder about it. Talking about it, just now, is so lovely for me. And that's the reason I am writing I suppose. For my own enjoyment. Sure I have some thoughts of sending this to a couple people later. Then they pass. This is just me with me right now. Sharing with myself, uninhibited with myself. just me, wrapped up in my own silence. Last night I realized that basically the natural drive of life is to experience more joy. This is the base reason for all actions. And it's okay. Like now I see that as okay. And what if that is the purpose of life? Even when I experience the emotions of sad, anger, depression, I am still experiencing true joy. True joy is not happiness to me. True joy is an experience of the unchanging, and happiness is an emotion. Like the same with unconditional love. To me that is a very different thing than the emotion of love. Its like the Unchanging One is made out of unconditional love and true joy. Tt's life that is the underlying reality. And it is there, 'waiting' no matter what . There is never not the Unchanging. But you can experience the illusion that there is not the Unchanging. I am glad I am not experiencing that anymore!! So, now I am going to go sit in my lover's arms. My lover that has no rules. Nothing that is seen as i m perfect about me. In fact, everything about me is exactly perfect. Not just that I am 'not broken', but that I am in a state of absolute perfection. All the time. And the more my lover tells me this, the more I remember it as well. The more I experience my own perfection, all the time. Wow. Ahhhhh. Love, Dhara Top

I will be adding to this section regularly ...